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My husbands lack of interest in me after birth of baby

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2016

    My husbands lack of interest in me after birth of baby

    I know this is somewhat common. I know because I have been reading many year old postings of this issue online recently because I couldn't understand why my husband of just 3 months has completely changed his demeanor around me.
    We both have children from previous marriages, joint custody, and therefore have a few days every other week to ourselves; or at least we did before our baby was born. We are extremely close, affectionate, have sex somewhat frequently including during my pregnancy. And then it seemed like he turned into a different person the morning our daughter was born.
    He barely touches me, won't spoon me with his body pressed up against mine, and really makes all efforts to keep busy around the house instead of us cuddling on the couch like we used to.
    I've brought these concerns up to him, told him I've felt as if he's distancing himself from me. That I feel like he's afraid to touch me or be too close to me. I've asked him if he was feeling differently about me after being in the room while I was giving birth, or because I was breast feeding constantly, or if he felt I was giving him less attention because of the baby.
    He says he was unaware he was acting differently and felt that I was more busy with the baby but nothing has changed in the way he feels about me.
    Im so frustrated because his behavior continues and I miss him so much. Our baby is a surprisingly good sleeper, and relatively easy and low fuss. I would have sex with him immediately if it weren't for my stitches needing more time to heal.
    Im afraid he's afraid to talk to me about how he's really feeling. I'm afraid he sees me as a mom and not a lover anymore. I'm afraid he'll seek out other female attention because he doesn't see me the same way.
    I would love and appreciate any advice in this area.
    Im sorry for such a long vent of a post but I don't really have anyone to talk to about this.
    Thank you!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2017
    I have seen and heard that mostly woman have lack of interest for their husband. Firstly because of the baby is the new occupation in their world. I think that time will pass after a while. Don't be afraid.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2017
    A new baby shakes things up. He might not be upset or unhappy with you at all. He might just be trying to find his new role in all of this or give you time to bond with the new baby. And try to stop being so anxious about it, it isn't good for anyone to make those kind of assumptions. Try to initiate intimacy with him. Hug him, give him a back rub. Whatever he normally likes. Pay him some special attention ☺

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