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Needing some advice....

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    12

    Needing some advice....

    Back story my husband and I have been married for 6 years and for over 5 of those he cheated and lied to me about what he was doing and where he was.... But recently we have been fighting alot.... And we say things not ment just out of anger.... And right now we are are the Verge of a divorce and he is blaming me for it.... He says that it's the way I call him names and yell at him... I stay stressed out because we have two small kids and one of them has been having behavior issues..... And I am stuck at home I don't have friends I never get time to myself.... I keep begging him to help me around our apartment just because I am overwhelmed and he says yes but never follows through with it.... So I stay stressed and angry.... And I just recently got on a birth control for hormone therapy..... So my mood is crazy there took.... He left angry tonight and I was just telling him about the kids and asked for my own curiosity if he was coming back tonight and he accused me of using the kids.... Than started talking about the fight and was obviously still angry and I said I don't want to talk about anything except the kids and he called me names and then asked me to tell our son something for him I said no he he was really mean to me.... If we get a divorce I am the one who has to leave a d I can't take my kids because he won't let me.... I don't want to leave my babies even for just a little while.... I don't know what to do.....

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Posts
    2

    Stay Strong

    Quote Originally Posted by kmchildr View Post
    Back story my husband and I have been married for 6 years and for over 5 of those he cheated and lied to me about what he was doing and where he was.... But recently we have been fighting alot.... And we say things not ment just out of anger.... And right now we are are the Verge of a divorce and he is blaming me for it.... He says that it's the way I call him names and yell at him... I stay stressed out because we have two small kids and one of them has been having behavior issues..... And I am stuck at home I don't have friends I never get time to myself.... I keep begging him to help me around our apartment just because I am overwhelmed and he says yes but never follows through with it.... So I stay stressed and angry.... And I just recently got on a birth control for hormone therapy..... So my mood is crazy there took.... He left angry tonight and I was just telling him about the kids and asked for my own curiosity if he was coming back tonight and he accused me of using the kids.... Than started talking about the fight and was obviously still angry and I said I don't want to talk about anything except the kids and he called me names and then asked me to tell our son something for him I said no he he was really mean to me.... If we get a divorce I am the one who has to leave a d I can't take my kids because he won't let me.... I don't want to leave my babies even for just a little while.... I don't know what to do....
    .
    Stay strong! It is hard but you have to do it for your kids. Can you go to couples counseling? If it doesn't work then I'm sure you can take your kids but consult a family lawyer in your area first. But try to make it work. Ask him if you can have a talk with him and tell him that things seem to be going downhill and you both should try to make it work, especially for the kids and ask if he is open to family counseling. Or you can try to avoid him as much as possible if he refuses to fix himself (this will lead to less fighting). Just act as if you two are roommates. Or instead of divorcing, legal separation? And still live together for the kids, so you don't have to be apart. Having no friends is hard, maybe a community like from a Catholic or Christian church just to have people there for you to lean on. But don't give up!!! Stay strong and hang in there! It will get better!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    Posts
    12
    Thank you. We have been doing counceling for about 3 years now. And not everything is because he cheated or his problems something's are because I get angry easyand say horrible things an d because I have zero self esteem.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2017
    Posts
    17
    That's good hear.

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